Finding the underlying issue behind eating patterns

When it comes to my eating patterns, in particular bingeing, there are several factors that come into play.   I tend to look at flour and sugar as the bad guys, triggering a neurochemical response that causes me to sometimes lose control and continue to eat way past the point of fullness.   However, something that is important to note is that sugar/flour sometimes cause me to eat to excess.   There are certainly times where I am able to consume these things without any craving or need to binge afterward.  It then seems inappropriate to look at them as the root of the problem, when there is another variable at play.  Sure, sugar can trigger a binge, but what is it that is causing me to have that response at certain times, while other times it doesn't?

I think it goes back to my emotional health and level of stress at the moment.  This weekend I was out of town visiting family.  One day, I had some pie for dessert, and then literally had a chocolate bar thrown at me, which I certainly ate.  I was able to stop after that and go to bed without much of an issue.   The day after, I ate lots of sweets throughout the day, and come evening had a massive binge on chocolates and other sweet things that was completely out of control.

So what was the difference between these two days?   These are potential explanations for the day of the binge:

• I had eaten sugar consistently throughout the day, before the binge began
• A particularly stressful/emotional day was coming up, and I didn't want to think about it
• I was alone at night watching TV
• I had consumed large quantities of caffeine during the day

I think stress is a huge factor here.  The upcoming day was something I was very concerned about, and when I'm worried about something I try to completely forget about it.  A binge is probably a way of helping me to avoid dealing with whatever is going on.  Not a very helpful method, but maybe at certain times I just don't know how to deal with things any other way.

What I think is important for me to learn is that sugar is not the root of the problem.  It triggers a reaction, sometimes, but the reason for this is deeper.  Simply getting rid of sugar and not dealing with the emotional issues that cause the binge is not solving the problem.   In a sense, a binge is sending me a message that there is something that needs to be dealt with.  I can avoid sugar for the rest of my life, but if I continue to be unable to manage my stress levels, am I really solving anything?

Learning to manage my stress may be the best thing I can do for myself.  By getting to the root of the problem, the symptoms can fall away on their own.  This sounds nice in theory, but managing stress is easier said than done.  I wish the problem was food itself, it would be easier to solve, but I need to start looking at myself and working on changing my habits and thought patterns if I'm going to find peace of mind.  I plan to explore different tools I can use to do this, rather than focusing only on the foods that I eat.

Goodbye to sweets

 I've reached the point where something has to change.  Since coming off of a low-carb diet, every single evening I've been eating one of those large 100g milk chocolate bars.  It's been some sort of habit I guess, something to look forward to in the evening.  The problem is, the more sugar I eat, the more I want.  Today I ate one of those big bars and wasn't satisfied at all, so I went and got another one.  That's a ridiculous amount of sugar.

Now, I can tolerate unhealthy habits for a while without letting them bother me.  But when it turns into binges, I can't accept it anymore.  And that's the truth when it comes to eating sugar, I always get to the point where I can't control my intake.  I'll moderate and control it, but then it seems like I need a higher "dose" to feel satisfied.  Is this a food or a drug?  I think the latter.

So tomorrow I'm kick-starting my transition back to a nutritious whole-foods diet.  I can't change it all at once, but the first major change is to cut out sweets.   In order to make it something realistic, I'm not yet going to obsess about small amounts of sugar added to other things like breads, sauces, etc.   I think that is the imperfection I need to make this something sustainable.

In a way it feels like a relief at the same time.   This has been the major thing preventing me from being able to make other improvements to my diet as well.  I kept holding on to it, saying how I would feel deprived if I couldn't eat sweets, etc.  But now it feels like the supposed comfort is causing more stress than anything.